Ya gonna nix the Albert Puhols deal, too, Emperor Stern???
Cardinals didn't get enough in return???
Lebron's gotta go back to the Cleveland Generals???
To even the score???
Guard Meadowlark Lemon???
And change the owner's diapers???
Ya gonna make Andrew Luck the second pick in the NFL draft???
Cus Indy can't have a monopoly on QB's???
Ya gonna not let Tim Tebow talk about God when he wins???
Separation of Church and Fate???
The crummy NBA teams get to play with six guys, right???
Just to even the score, right???
Gonna make Dwight Howard play with himself???
Because he has an unfair advantage???
Ryan Braun can use steroids???
Cus he's in Milwaukee???
And Milwaukee needs all the help it can get???
President Obama can't use the teleprompter???
Cus he can read better than the Republican candidates???
Brett Favre has to wear Levis???
And worst of all???
You're gonna break our hearts???
By making the Most Interesting Man???
Drive a Yugo???
And eat lots of chocolate???
So he'll have a pimple on his posterior???
Just to make it fair???
Say it ain't so, Emperor Stern...